Born: June 9, 1972
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December 18, 2005 at 08:30 am
"It's Time That We End All Arguments About: What is a Bar-B-Q!"
Kansas Citians pride themselves on their barbeque. In fact, I’d bet that if you would ask a older Kansas Citian, they’d most likely tell you that barbeque originated here.
There are two main arguments that a Kansas Citian will use to describe what barbeque is: (1) that it’s all in the sauce, and (2) that the meat has got to be slow cooked (either over wood or hot coals). Some people will even argue that the meat should be smoked (ala Gates Bar-B-Q) to be true barbeque. But, most who live in this fine city will all agree: Kansas City has the best barbeque.
While growing up in Southern California, barbeque came with a much different mentality. Pretty much everything we grilled outside was called barbeque. It could be done on a coal-burning grill or a gas grill and it was still barbeque. It could be steak, or hamburgers, or vegetable kabobs. If it was grilled it was barbequed. Likewise, we even call the grills themselves “barbeques” (e.g., “I should to go fire-up the barbeque,” or, “Maybe it’s time that we go buy a new barbeque”).
This mentality does not sit too kindly with Kansas Citians. No, in fact, Kansas Citians, will take any opportunity they can to correct someone who does not possess the correct definition of what barbeque truly is.
In years past, this same argument has arisen between my family who liver here in Kansas City and my family who live in California. Two of the people who seem to always come back for more are my dad and my wife, Julianna. To give you a glimpse into this long-running — and never-won — battle (or, at least, a glimpse into how crazy my family is), I present to you a letter that we recently received from my dad…
Dear Tim and “JULIANNA”:As you can see, there is some amount of passion behind these arguments. As for Julianna and I… I think we will remain silent on the matter. My father thinks he is correct, and that is fine. We are secure in our barbequeness.
It is time that we end all arguments about: what is Bar-B-Q!
As you will clearly see from this article (click the picture to the right to read the article – Ed), a Bar-B-Q is when one cooks meat over “hot coals.” Yes we So. Californians know what barbecue is. I understnad that the Mid Westerners have been a little confused thinking that it is all in the idea of having a sauce.
But as I had tried to explain in our last conversation, they did not name a sauce first then come up with a way to cook the meat. No, they developed a way to cook the meat first, and then called this method of cooking, a “Barbecue.” Then, as one could see in the progression of this method of cooking meat, a Mid Westerner then came up with a sauce, and at that time one might have said: this would taste good on that good old fashioned way of cooking meat over hot coals that they cann a Bar-B-Q. And when they had what is now known as Bar-B-Q sauce that is put on “MEAT THAT IS SLOWLY COOKED OVER HOT COALS” (or hot flames).
I am so glad that we are able to go to a third party, and objective and intelligent source to end a little famliy squabble. Of course, this intelligent source confirmed my position, but we won’t ma a big deal out of this, WILL WE JULIANNA and Tim.
I’ve got to go. Sandy and I, here in So. California, are going to Bar-B-Q some salmon tonight. Yep, we are going to slowly cook this slab of fish (meat) over some nice hot coals, that we now call a Weber.
As thos West Indians would say: “Meat good! Don’t keep meat too long on Bar-B-Q.”
Love,
Dad
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Comments (16)
Ha ha ha! Oh, man, that’s all we need: some hopped up Aussies getting in the mix.
Well, as I said, I’m secure in my barbequeness (even though I do know many people who would say that what you’re describing is “grilling,” not “barbequeing”).
Well, as I said, I’m secure in my barbequeness (even though I do know many people who would say that what you’re describing is “grilling,” not “barbequeing”).
» Comment by timsamoff () (URL), on December 18, 2005 at 7:10 pm
1. Texans are willing to concede that Kansas City in general has better BBQ. As does Memphis. In general.
2. But taken state-for-state, the whole of Texas generally has better BBQ than the whole of Kansas. Or the whole of TN.
3. Texas Monthly’s issue on the topic a few years back is one of the best I’ve read.
4. The Oxford American does a poor job talking about the topic, and is too ‘deep south centric’
5. I vehemently disagree: it’s NOT in the sauce, anymore than “Emergent” is in the candles.
6. Californians and northerners in general cannot barbeque. They can, however, Weber™.
7. Beer brats on a propane grill is not BBQ.
8. Brisket to some is the king of BBQ. I prefer a good brisket to ribs anyday.
9. Sans-sauce is the only way to tell if you’ve done a good job with the barbequeing.
10. that’s all. I’m just having fun.
2. But taken state-for-state, the whole of Texas generally has better BBQ than the whole of Kansas. Or the whole of TN.
3. Texas Monthly’s issue on the topic a few years back is one of the best I’ve read.
4. The Oxford American does a poor job talking about the topic, and is too ‘deep south centric’
5. I vehemently disagree: it’s NOT in the sauce, anymore than “Emergent” is in the candles.
6. Californians and northerners in general cannot barbeque. They can, however, Weber™.
7. Beer brats on a propane grill is not BBQ.
8. Brisket to some is the king of BBQ. I prefer a good brisket to ribs anyday.
9. Sans-sauce is the only way to tell if you’ve done a good job with the barbequeing.
10. that’s all. I’m just having fun.
» Comment by paulsoup () (URL), on December 18, 2005 at 9:07 pm
Wow, Paul… That’s an impressive list. 
I agree that the sauce is not what makes something “barbeque” (I was just stating it as a common opinion). I do know that I’m not very impressed with Texas barbeque — a little too TexMex in my experience (but, honestly, I haven’t had much). Brisket could be considered barbeque if you ascribe to the “slow cook” theory, but I’m not so sure if I would call it that — brisket is another form of cooking on its own.
I agree that the sauce is not what makes something “barbeque” (I was just stating it as a common opinion). I do know that I’m not very impressed with Texas barbeque — a little too TexMex in my experience (but, honestly, I haven’t had much). Brisket could be considered barbeque if you ascribe to the “slow cook” theory, but I’m not so sure if I would call it that — brisket is another form of cooking on its own.
» Comment by timsamoff () (URL), on December 19, 2005 at 09:22 am
hahahahhha!! awesome. I’m the senior Samoff on this. Hilarious… Oops, gotta go fire up the BBQ. Later!
» Comment by Dennis the menace () , on December 19, 2005 at 12:07 pm
I’m WITH the senior Samoff, i mean. Oops.
» Comment by Dennis the menace () , on December 19, 2005 at 1:46 pm
I got it, Dennis… But, then again, you are from Southern California as well.
» Comment by timsamoff () (URL), on December 19, 2005 at 2:28 pm
Interesting how the “BBQ” is used differently.
We BBQ meat. We light the BBQ. We have a BBQ.
You guys just BBQ.
FYI “Grilling” is what happens in the bit between the stove(top) and the oven – usually to cheese on toast. Or maybe to chops in a vertical electric appliance popular in the 1980s.
We BBQ meat. We light the BBQ. We have a BBQ.
You guys just BBQ.
FYI “Grilling” is what happens in the bit between the stove(top) and the oven – usually to cheese on toast. Or maybe to chops in a vertical electric appliance popular in the 1980s.
» Comment by Luke () , on December 20, 2005 at 5:28 pm
I’m not sure I want to step in the middle of this…but I will. :)
It sounds like your dad has your wife backed into a corner on this…I think I have to side with him from a historical standpoint.
However, as a good postmodern, I know that the definition of BBQ can be whatever I want it to be and I don’t have to give a flip what anyone else’s perspective is. I would argue that true BBQ is both — it is delightfully cooked meat flavored with savory smoke, plus a good sauce made from scratch.
It sounds like your dad has your wife backed into a corner on this…I think I have to side with him from a historical standpoint.
However, as a good postmodern, I know that the definition of BBQ can be whatever I want it to be and I don’t have to give a flip what anyone else’s perspective is. I would argue that true BBQ is both — it is delightfully cooked meat flavored with savory smoke, plus a good sauce made from scratch.
» Comment by john () (URL), on December 20, 2005 at 6:22 pm
Ok, first, let me clarify with Luke that the Aussie description of BBQ is much like the Southern Californian one — and, since I grew up in SoCA, I grew up under that opinion (my friends and I used to throw barbeques all the time).
As for John’s description… Well, the last part would actually jibe well with the Kansas Citian opinion, so I don’t know exactly how the historical aspect fits in.
Yes, this is definitely a hard-fought battle where I see little ground gained by either side.
As for John’s description… Well, the last part would actually jibe well with the Kansas Citian opinion, so I don’t know exactly how the historical aspect fits in.
Yes, this is definitely a hard-fought battle where I see little ground gained by either side.
» Comment by timsamoff () (URL), on December 20, 2005 at 7:20 pm
funny topic of conversation – when in north carolina many years ago at a summer camp, i was told that bbq is actually a NOUN – meaning you can go to the store (and i verified this) and you can buy bbq, which is this sick looking pork in a glass jar that has some red sauce on it. at least that was true 15 years ago… and i always thought it was funny. hehe – i can see both points, though, so i won’t be the divisive one here!
» Comment by jason () (URL), on December 22, 2005 at 02:11 am
can’t we alll just get along?”
Merry Christmas. Brisket is barbeque. Barbeque really is a noun and a verb (and if you’re talking in a drawl, sometimes an adjective), but it has nothing to do with “pork in a jar”... To wit:
“Wanna go git some barbeque?”
“Shore. Jonny-Ray barbequed some brisket and ribs this mornin’.”
“I love barbeque ribs”
“Well better git there quick-like. The pit crew stops cooking at 10 am, and usually run out by noon.”
“Can you believe it: Sue ruins her ribs by puttin sawce all over it. Just like a Yankee.”
“Just because she’s from north of Texas doesn’t make her a Yankee…”
“Well, close ‘nuff…” ....
(fade to black) (applause, applause, applause).
Merry Christmas. Brisket is barbeque. Barbeque really is a noun and a verb (and if you’re talking in a drawl, sometimes an adjective), but it has nothing to do with “pork in a jar”... To wit:
“Wanna go git some barbeque?”
“Shore. Jonny-Ray barbequed some brisket and ribs this mornin’.”
“I love barbeque ribs”
“Well better git there quick-like. The pit crew stops cooking at 10 am, and usually run out by noon.”
“Can you believe it: Sue ruins her ribs by puttin sawce all over it. Just like a Yankee.”
“Just because she’s from north of Texas doesn’t make her a Yankee…”
“Well, close ‘nuff…” ....
(fade to black) (applause, applause, applause).
» Comment by paulsoup () (URL), on December 23, 2005 at 09:09 am
BBQ must be a good thing for people to be fighting over who gets to own that word. Can’t just have people in Texas cooking brisket for 14 hours with hickory and people in California throwing a slab of salmon over the kingsford briquettes and have them both use the same word.
Strange how there is this passion, all in fun, not over the goodness of the activites, but over what the activity is called.
There’s an interesting ponder here — I wonder how much of the struggle to be the church is like this — we really don’t disagree that the thing you are cooking is delicious, we just don’t want you to call it BBQ.
Strange how there is this passion, all in fun, not over the goodness of the activites, but over what the activity is called.
There’s an interesting ponder here — I wonder how much of the struggle to be the church is like this — we really don’t disagree that the thing you are cooking is delicious, we just don’t want you to call it BBQ.
» Comment by Michael Toy () (URL), on December 25, 2005 at 1:48 pm
Ha ha! That’s an interesting observations, Michael! 
» Comment by timsamoff () (URL), on December 25, 2005 at 1:56 pm
Just chuck a coldie in the esky, whack on some Cold Chisel and chill out.